This year is my 26th year of Chinese New Year, quite feel a quater of my life is gone, 3 quater left, but this Chinese New Year is quite enjoyful for me.
Had a small gathering with my primary school friend, I feel quite excited about it actually, I always like to meet my primary school friends, at least most of them. This year is kinda funny because invited a funny guy at last minute. Maybe I am too observative, last time he actually wear quite some pink accessories on him which tell us that he want to have a girlfriend or friend ( I favor the first ), poor kid doesn't know how the society and social psychology works. I know how it works but I choose to be single. This year I have done something I consider crazy, add my first love back into my facebook friend but get denied. Hmmm, many factors and reason but I think most probably is I don't worth to be her friend, only can be pass-byer only. I actually saw her parents on my cousin's wedding dinner, I greet her dad but i bet he forget who am i, good also since i am nothing to him, for now. I try to control my hormon well by facing her back so that my heart won't be touched by her again. And i train myself not to be touched again, seal off myself untill i met another set of hormon that unlock it.
Quite surprise for me that another primary school female friend is friendzoned, although i got do some prediction about her relationship, i reset it last year when i heard how she answer when someone ask her one specific question but i am still surprise about it, it's my bad habit for doing those deduction, accidentally done it. Haiz, poor girl, and i feel sorry about it. I predicted mine well, i got try to do something about it but it's all too late for me because i am too dumb, don't know how to recover the big picture. Doesn't matter, i think she will be happier without me because i don't know how to make her happy.
back to science, relationship is actually a simple thing but human is too busy to define it and to prove it, the majority reason why relationship fail is both side constantly ask something from the other one or expect something from other side. It's mother of all failure, even me also one of the victim of this failure. i know understand this at the very early stage of my relationship, and i know exactly what is the majority reason why relationship success, it's a direct opposite of reason of fail. Constantly ask about myself what can i give her instead of ask what can she give her at present and future. so why i still fail since i know? i don't know deep enough that time. i still fail because i give her what i want to give instead of what she need. a terrible mistake for me, so people who reading this, please wake up, don't be stubborn, make some changes or you will fail like me. this doesn't need rocket science level to understand.
human being is too busy to earn money and no time to explore themselves, they forgot no matter what we do, we are slave of our sensors, our eyes want to see beautiful things, our nose want to smell something good, our mouth want to say what we want to say as long as the words make us feel great, ears want to listen good music, our skin want to touch something smooth and soft, our tongue want to taste something good, so, you tell me, OTHER THAN A GIRL THAT YOU LOVE, WHAT ELSE IN THIS UNIVERSE CAN FULFILL THE PLEASURE OF ALL THE SENSORS OF OUR BODY AT THE SAME TIME? this is why human have a really hard time when lose a lover because all sensors lost their pleasure all at the same time, it's very suffering, that's why you can see many many side effects of losing a lover, those sensors will try to seek replacement, some will spend money to buy many stuff to relax their nerve center, eat many stuff for tongue pleasure, play sport or concentrate on work to make a distraction of the sensors and many more things. Drugs is very close to fulfill every sensors of our body but the side effects is too huge and it's illegal. that's why many religion train people to control the sensors of our body instead of sensors control us, they learn to repel and have no feelings about materials, beautiful girls, meat and many more. i think i have train myself quite well about this but i am still constantly upgrading myself. so next time when you want to get involve in love, better know some science of it or you will end up with lots of failure.
so appreciation of each other is very important, when i was in relationship, i treat every meet up with her is the first time and the last time we will be meet. i cherish every moment i be with her because the universe is constantly killing living organism, we really don't know will we survive until tomorrow to see each other again, that's why if a person really love the other one, he or she really got no time to start any argument because they choose love instead of argue, but of course we cannot repeat the same mistake to make ourselves to fall into argument situation at the first place, for me, the best method of solving problem is never let the problem has a start.
So, in the name of science, go understand more about the one you love, keep on improving your understanding skill, always ask what to give instead of what to take, evolve around what she or he needs without jeopardize your own life and your own place, respect each others difference, if both also do like this, i believe this relationship will last till the end of time.
back to the topic, this new year didn't really gamble much, i successfully control the excitement of want to gamble, and i let my taste buds lose. i eat quite a lot this year, my weight is close to 61kg, quite funny that when i go to visit one of my friends house, that friend actually ask all of us except me to weight themselves see whether can qualify to join a unofficial club call THE 8 CLUB, which mean the figure of your weight is start with the digit 8. so many fat ass among my friends, i hold the knowledge of how to reduce and maintain our weight in simple way but i think their ego is too high to listen my voice. doesn't matter, because i am not the one who will suffer the illness that fat brings.
too many things want to write down to share but next time la... ... ...
